My Secret Recommendation To Happiness

The past few months that I have last posted on here have been the most fruitful ones ever. Fruitful in the sense that I learned a lot about myself in leaps and bounds that I never imagined I could possibly can. And this has made me come into a sort of sound maturity to help me and others through any difficult situations that may arise in future.

But before I begin to sound smug or like someone who has got life all figured out, I would say that I haven't got the slightest clue to life as there are limitlessness lessons to learn from it every time. It deals you a lot of blows but you've got to learn to fight back. You will fall, but don't stay down for long. If I did, I wouldn't be sharing this with you.

I'm sure you are as anxious to know about this 'secret recommendation to happiness' as I'm in getting it across to you in simple language. And my journey to this discovery didn't start smooth. It had been a rough ride. Yes, rough ride. It was bumpy, lumpy and it’s got a lot of potholes too. Who says life is an easy road?

When we experience success, we feel good about ourselves but when we are faced with failure, it is often accompanied by a feeling of depression. When this happens, we begin to blame ourselves for what went wrong and then we feel sorry for ourselves for days, weeks, months...Trust me, when you are in this state, nothing makes any sense. Even few encouraging words from people or the love from family only lasts for a space of time before we relapse again. But how do you bring yourself out of this state of depression and unhappiness?

It is no different from how I felt when I went through some setbacks and rejections for a particular period in my life. I pulled through by first acknowledging my feelings and the reason why I felt what I felt. Then comes the shocking remedy called gratefulness. There, I have just let the secret out. I began to be grateful for the setbacks and rejections that came my way, because if they hadn't, I wouldn't have been able to discover a lot about myself. I wouldn't have been able to know my weakness and how best to work hard at making it my strength. And all of a sudden everything else began to add up. I'm a strong believer in the biblical principle which says 'in everything, give thanks.' It is so true and it eases a lot of burdens and pain we carry in our hearts.

When you are grateful in everything, it opens up a lot of positive energy within you and it makes you reason differently and where will you go in life without positivity? Being grateful is the most difficult thing to do when you are in a mess or when you are in so much pain. But that is also where your victory lies. So when you find that moment of sanity and you want to break free, search within yourself and find a reason to be grateful. And know this that you are never alone in your pain, there is always someone who had been in a similar situation before or even worse. So look inside and count your blessings, you'll be surprised what you find and the peace you derive from it. I'll leave you with this quote 'true happiness is hidden in a grateful heart'.

A Positive Swagger :D

Its the beginning of another year. 'Oh Kenny, like we don't already know that, I hear you say.' But hang on! Its just not like any other year for me. This time, it's different and special. Yes, special. I just feel excited and positive about this year already. But why? I also don't know. I just have an inkling that its going to be a good one. And I'm beginning to believe it in my bones.

Perhaps, it could be because I have chosen to sing a new song. A song of positivity. Another reason could be because of a happy family event coming up in a few month. All of these are just beginnings of good things to come and before I know it, I would be counting all my blessings.

Happiness is a mental state characterized by positive emotions. So why not be positive about life? It is so easy to be happy but a lot of times, we forget how to be. Or sometimes we think our happiness lie in someone or in things. And by things, I mean money, cars, clothes, security, you name what your things are. It is only when we get those things or the someone and you still have that compressed face or the sulky and wishy-washy mouth, then do you start to question why everything seems to be going wrong for you. Oh poor me. Does that not sound too familiar? You need to stop it! Stop it!!!

Ok, I'll go softer on you now. The power to be happy is within you. The answer is right inside of you. I know it sounds more easier said than done. But at the end of the day, what have you got to loose? As a matter of fact, you have got a lot more to gain. What is the point of being negative when you could be experiencing intense joy through positivity. And if things don't turn out the way you hoped through your positivity, at least you have saved yourself a heartache or severe health issue. And this doesn't mean things wouldn't turn out good eventually. It always does in the end and then we wonder why we almost killed our self with worry.

This year, I'm making a mental shift. I'm leaving the boat of negativity and jumping on the ship of positivity. I have got my positive swagger on. Is anyone coming along with me? Happy New year, everyone!

My Sushi Experience

I am very adventurous when it comes to food. Aside from my usual taste of African foods, I like to try out different dishes ranging from continental to oriental. My instinct would be to try it first to see whether its something I would like or not and if I decide its for me, I always tend to make it my own, to the extent that I can sometimes go out of my way to learn to cook it. But if not, I stay away from it completely. I have always been a huge fan of Chinese and I like India as well, particularly tikka masala. Recently, I have just tried the Spanish 'tapas' and 'Paella' - lovely, by the way. But having said that, I will let my focus be on sushi for now.

I stumbled on sushi on a wimp. While I love Chinese, I would never dream of taking myself to a sushi bar for a meal, no offense to the Japanese. In fact, I was just around Westminster in London on a visit with a friend when I walked past Yo Sushi restaurant. We both were very hungry and wanted to have a quick snack before dinner which wouldn't be till later in the evening. Looking into the restaurant, which I thought looked very inviting, I could see the arrays of color-coded bowls being rotated on a conveyor belt, and I couldn't help but be enticed and curious. Going against my better judgment, I thought, why not? Sometimes some risk are worth taking. But in all my acquired taste, I still find Sushi very daunting. Perhaps this is due to the fact that majority of its components are raw never mind the taste of seaweed which I wouldn't normally eat on a good day.

Each step towards the restaurant filled me with doubt as well as anxiety but I didn't look back. Even as the waiter lead us to a seat on the bar, with the menu shoved in our hands, he asked us to choose from any variety of classic dishes ranging from sashimi,tempura, salads and sushi s being passed around on the conveyor belt. Looking at the ladies who were busy and fast at work, making and cutting freshly-made sushi from rice, sea-foods, fish and seaweed, I was encouraged to try my first taste of the sushi which can be compared to mamyte (you can either love it or hate it). And they are not all raw by the way. Its all a matter of choice, depending on the color of bowl you choose from. I settled for a cooked option which was a cooked prawn and chives with mayonnaise with my drink clasp in my hand ready to be gulped down just in case it doesn't go down well. To my expectation, it wasn't bad at all! I liked it. And that gave me the courage to try the raw option (their signature dish) - salmon, avocado, masago (fish roe) and mayonnaise. That also tasted excellent. Others followed, California roll, spicy chicken while also keeping a tab of out budget. Because even though the price of one dish could be as low as £1.70 or £2.30. You could end up with a huge bill if your main target is to fill up.

I left the restaurant feeling satisfied and accomplished. The whole experience was worth it. At least now, I can boldly say, I have tried sushi before. So its a case of 'Been there, done that and got the tee-shirt :D'. But if you ask me if I would want to go back again, I would say probably not. Its not something I would want to have as a meal. So no thanks. I think you should also try it and let me know what you think :D.

Necessities - mother of invention

My apologies for the late entry this month but like they say, its better late than never. I have been neck-deep in a lot of work which has pretty much kept me on my toes and somewhat away from my little pleasures.

You know how it is when you are looking for a job and you wish that anything comes your way, since you know you have got the capability to do it. But eventually when the job comes and the floods of challenges that comes with it is almost drowning you - you then start to wonder where those precious moments you have somewhat taken for granted have gone. So be careful what you wish for.

But I'm not complaining. As a matter of fact, my reflection is the main inspiration behind my recent discovery. Because my freelance copywriting job permits me to work from home, I tend to get most of it done right on my bed. This is an ideal creative environment for me, aside from the ease and comfort of just picking my laptop up beside my bed.

However, the downside to that is an acute back pain which I makes it very difficult to stand up straight sometimes. Besides that, I notice my laptop gets overheated due to blockage of its air vents caused by my duvey or sometimes my clothing - needless to say the strain and pain exerted on my lap in the process ( which makes me question the reason why it was named a laptop in the first place). My laptop has also taken a fall several times from the bed due to one wrong shift or movement.

The list of disadvantages is endless but you would think I would be put off from working on my bed by this. I think not! Instead, I sought for ways to make my working conditions better. I was having a conversation with a friend one day when he mentioned that he had just bought a breakfast-in-bed table to have his meals and then to read afterwards and it occured to me that I could do the same for my laptop. I also wondered why the idea never occured to me all this time! And believe me, it works! But when you are buying, buy a good one with firm legs to carry the weight of your laptop so it doesn't give way while working.

When I made my purchase on Amazon.co.uk, they suggested an orthopedic pillow (designed for back, shoulder and neck) which I bought together with my break-in-bed table and since both products arrived on my doorstep, life couldn't have been much easier!

First time experiences

There is always a first time in life when we get to attempt new and different things. I seemed to have experienced a lot of 'first times' these past few months. And my experiences, nontheless, were fondly memorable. I will try as much as possible to make it short so as not to bore you.

It was the first time I ever tried dumpling and chicken - loved it! I attempted to make it afterwards and luckily it didn't turn into a disaster. Except when I got to find out later on that I should have mixed the corn flour in a little water to thicken the broth. Of course, that was like administering medine after death. Needless to say that I ended up with a few lumps in my broth because I had sprinkled the dry corn flour directly without mixing in water.

It was the first time I ever visited a Museum. You can scoff all you want. But yes, a museum! I visited the Natural History Museum in South Kensington on boxing day. And it was a far cry from the preconceived ideas I held about museums. I was awed by the many attractions this museum has got to offer. I was particularly intrigued by the dinosaurs, the birds and the human analogy galleries. It wasn't boring at all.

Although it wasn't the first time I have been an auntie, but it was the first time I was at delivery, held a day old baby and get to change a nappy. My nephew, Onyinye was born last month and watching his development is interesting at the same time amazing (I'm not talking about the late nights though).

Aside from my writing and online blogging experience, I officially got my first freelance copywriting experience. It's been challenging but very fulfilling. Challenging in the sense that it involves a lot of intense researching which can be mentally draining at times and having to combine writing several articles in a week with my part-time job. Fulfilling in the sense that I'm finally getting to do what I have always enjoyed doing. Seeing your creativity out in the media is the best feeling in the world.

I could go on and on about the experiences I have had within the last few days and months but I wouldn't want to bore you with my stories. Rather, why not share your own first time experiences with me and your feelings at the time.

A plausible excuse ;)

The month of April took me by surprise and I couldn't believe it went past without a single post from me. I take full responsibility for that - my apologies. I have this bad habit of leaving everything to the last minute. This is mainly because I perform best under pressure which had always worked well for me. But unfortunately this time, circumstances worked against me.

I had my article ready exactly on the afternoon of the 30th of April and I clicked on the 'Publish post' button when I was done with my editing. But I noticed the internet had gone off. I didn't think much of it as that happens once in a while especially during peak periods and I thought I could always post it later in the day as at the time, I was also running late for my part-time job.

So off I went to work and came back in the evening only to find out from my sister, to my horror, that a BT staff who worked on our neighbour's phone line had in the process tampered with ours. She found out too late and by the time she called the BT office, they were closed for the day and since it was a Friday, their staff dont work on weekends. Monday was a bank holiday, so not until Tuesday before they can send someone to fix the problem.

Aside from the fact that it was going to be an unbearable long weekend without internet or interesting and favorite programmes on TV, it occured to me that I wouldn't be able to publish my post for April and I tried to device alternative ways to get it published.

Initially, I tried using my BlackBerry as an internet modem for my laptop (Thanks to my friend who is a network engineer). First we had to check if my phone supports the operation and to my greatest relief, it does but that could only be possible through bluetooth. At least, no hope lost. But checking the icons on the right bottom of my laptop, I couldn't find any bluetooth symbol! And I never found any even after going through the device manager in my computer!

Once I settled the fact that my laptop hasn't got a bluetooth to work with my phone, I decided to try the last desperate attempt to try and post my article. I tried posting through my BB! But working on internet on my phone is like that of a snail crossing a tarred street. I was still trying to log into my blogger account when 12am ticked by! And I thought, what the heck! I might as well wait to write a better blog for May.

I know it's not a good excuse but maybe a plausible one ;). But having said that, excuses are pit-holes I try to avoid most of the time. This brings to mind a favorite quote from an unknown author and drummed in by one of my pastors.

"Excuses are the tools of the incompetent, the monuments of nothingness,those who use them are not wise"

To end on a good note, I thought I would atone for my sins by submiting an early post this month and maybe even compensate by two (although that is not a promise). But I promise to make the next post an interesting one :). I know this because I'm already brewing up something good.

Enjoy your week!

When Steam Run Out

My apologies for posting this entry very late. I wasn't intentionally trying to ignore you. Its been a crazy month but I wouldn't let it go without a fight.Thats why I have this determination to post this, even if it was the last minute of the 31st of March.

I had to rack my brain for a suitable subject but couldn't come up with one, so I decided to share my own experience perhaps someone would relate to that.

Have you ever started something cheerfully and then along the way got discouraged because things are not going as expected. Thats the feeling I had when I started the month and even the year generally (as you all know, one-third of the year is gone already. And before we know it, the whole year!)

Its a similar feeling to when I got a new job one time and I was excited to start this particular job. Each morning, I would wake up with excitement knowing I have a job to go to. But as days rolled into weeks and weeks into months and years, I began to loose interest and the motivation wasn't just there anymore.

The same feeling can be applied to job hunting. When you feel excited and motivated after applying for various job vacancies. You must agree that job searching, itself is a job. You can imagine the boredom and mental exhaustion you get trying to scale through the same rigorous questions from different employers. And the feeling of immense relief when you finally press the send button for your application to be accepted. But after endless expectation, one or two reply to say the dreaded word 'We are sorry your application is not successful'.

Or lets take a look at another scenerio, when you have an idea of a business proposal and you were able to finally put your business into action. But along the line, you feel discouraged when the effort and capital you invested still hasn't resulted in much profit

We can go on and on to count a thousand and one cases of situations and challenges that arise to test our patience and tenacity. But they all come under one umbrella, no matter the angle from which you want to look at it.

It is okay to run out of steam or feel discouraged at certain point in life as we are all human. I think it would be untruthful to deny those feelings ever existed within us. We can either ignore it and keep feeling sorry for ourselves or pay attention to it and use it for our strength.

When we pay attention to those feelings, we can turn it around for our own good because strength and resilience comes from acknowledging that we are running out of steam and need to energise ourselves so we don't die down.

If you feel one strategy isn't working, why don't you try another approach. Or if you feel you are not where you are meant to be, then maybe its time to move on. I know it may sound too easy but I think its best to be accused of trying than to give up and attain nothing. (I had to rephrase that and I kinda liked it :).

Hope someone is inspired by this because I just did. In a way I was speaking for myself :)